Choice and Opting Out

Sometimes the best thing one may do is walk away from tolerable to exist in the chaos, stopping all “business as usual,” until a light bulb turns on in the dark, showing you how unacceptable tolerable actually was.

Then, one may start walking again. Or running, as the case may be, with untolerable hot on your tails trying to reconcile the dissonance in a new dimension.

Creating New Blogs

I don’t know what “Bloggers” do, I know what I do, and I do it for my reasons — others have their ideas as to what those are, yet those people do not know me.

I use blogs to organize thoughts, ideas, pieces of me that are just a part of me, and since I have always “blogged” and used the internet and most of its incarnations for doing just that,¬†this is just what I do. ¬†I sometimes just create a blog and write out an¬†idea, sometimes¬†getting back to it eventually, and sometimes leaving it for¬†others may¬†stumble along it and do the idea up righteously. ¬†Good luck following along.

So, I “closed” my NSFW¬†NikIVTumblingAroundTumblr¬†blog (stopping at 666 pages seemed right for this project), and I will now spend the next couple of months augmenting and editing it to be in its final form. ¬†I grew quite fond of my first “porn” blog site, with a mix in my feed that was always pushing all my favorite buttons, art, science, tech, space, peace, activism, sexy.

When Tumblr first came on the scene, i was like WHOA!!!! ¬†I signed up right away with an even more NSFW concept yet I found that I wasn’t ready to go down that path yet and that project still waits for me. ¬†When¬†my teenage daughter said she was on Tumblr (FanDom Central!), I knew I had to jump into the mix somehow. ¬†I created NikiVTumblingAround and¬†several¬†other “interest” blogs on Tumblr, curated and found a feed with a happy medium to form a porn site I actually think I would enjoy randomly finding on the internet. ¬†That I curated a porn site would shock most of the people I actually know in real life, well, now that I think about it, maybe not anymore.

I have used my experience with this blog to inform my activism off-line as well as develop several other concepts relating to my perpetual online activism. My¬†NSFW¬†“URDaughtersFirstPortSite” is a blog that I’m developing¬†an off-line component to introduce to my local community as more young men and ladies get into the naked selfie / sex video normalcy of this new reality. ¬†We already had one issue in our small community of this “tumblrworld mindset” where a cos-play online game brought in a young lady who got caught up way over her head, parents had no idea any of this world even existed, let alone that their daughter was involved.

Coming out of NikiVTumbingAround¬†directly, are two blogs: ¬†(1) a¬†password protected, Cocktale Hour,¬†which¬†will be¬†even more intimate writings based on images that i enjoy, so a bit more comprehensive than my¬†NSFW¬†URpleasURe blog here on WordPress; and (2)¬†Curing Cosmic Boredom,¬†a considerably¬†less racy than¬†NikiVTumblingAround¬†with a very specific intent of “looking 4 love on tumblr dot com.” ¬† While there are many parts of porn on the internet I just cannot support on General Principle, I find that most people engage in those realities as a form of stimulation because nothing in their lives are giving any real meaning, boredom basically. ¬†I think that’s why I include that reality now, unashamed and “part of the problem” to bring about a solution to the underlying causes.

Ok, I think I got all that straight, my NSFW blogospheric reality nutshell. ¬†And no, i’m not a cam girl. ¬†And no, I do not have a KIK account. ¬†And, no, i don’t blog for money (as strange as that may seem these days). ¬†And, no, unless you are my cosmic consort, you may not text me.

Playing Games Of Awareness

I guess I just wonder most of the time, are people really that stupid* or are they just afraid of what others may do to them if others thought they were smarter than the other? Or, maybe, they are not afraid at all, they KNOW they will get fired and choose to not bother being smart in public to their own harm?

Or maybe they think that what they think is something they should keep to themselves?  Then I wonder why they do not choose to share them?  And then I wonder why I wonder WHY anyone else makes the choices they make?  *tangent*

Or, maybe, smart people keep their smart thoughts to themselves because they think they can leverage them later for a paycheck or something?  that money thing always seems to be a powerful organizer of thoughts here on planet earth, i wonder what would happen if everyone shared their thoughts just because it was what it took to save the planet?

*I KNOW. ¬†I know “stupid” is not “A Nice Word” (as in “use your nice words to say hard things”);¬†yet, sometimes, ‘stupid is as stupid does’ is just the plain truth that deserves¬†no trimmings.

The truth is, when you start asking questions like, “why AM I angry?”¬† and you start beginning to actually answering a question like that, you enter into a game of emotions.¬† Games played when you were a child to deal with the emotions of those around you who could project that which angered them on you because they could.

The child, not knowing that mom was just “losing her mind” because of something that had NOTHING to do with you, but how COULD you possibly know that with how they were acting, voicing, and being?¬†

So, when you realize that your anger stems from ancestral or projected realities, what is in this moment.¬† How critical is “the moment” to have a peaceful reality?¬† And, how do you create it for yourself?¬†

If you can do that, time+space+vibration combines with arbitrary randomness of the reality that exists in the now for what purpose?¬† something that has nothing to do with you, unless you KNOW string theory, chaos theory, oneness theory, and that integrating two more senses isn’t that big of a deal is it?¬† which two do you need to integrate more right now?

sight?¬† sound?¬† there’s the #inet4that, right?

sound?  lol, big brother.

taste?¬† touch?¬† hmmmm, yeah, those two.¬† sigh.¬† can’t ever forget those two most important.¬† maybe i’ll focus on that here.¬† and, just 2 mess with everyone’s mind a little bit more, we all like a little friendly competition, don’t we, maybe I can get Qoco to play with me here.¬† Qoco is played by The First Husband.¬† so, lots of history, inside jokes, and hopefully love beyond the divorce to honor the people we are and our daughter.